I worked as an agronomist. That meant I walked corn and soybean fields in the growing season, and delivered weekly reports to farmers regarding when to water, fertilize, and otherwise manage their crop production. Being an agronomist also meant I was covered in mud, dirt, pollen, and bugs for most of the year.
One day I left home without packing my lunch, so I bought a cheeseburger in Johnstown. I highly recommend the L Bow Room! As I was eating in my pickup, I spilled some ketchup on my sweatshirt sleeve. I rolled my sleeve up so I didn’t get ketchup on anything else.
As I did that, I noticed my rubber irrigation overalls, my boots, even my sweatshirt were covered in mud! I laughed out loud at myself, and how ridiculous I was; muddy, but rolling my sleeve up to avoid getting ketchup on me!
Then the Lord showed me how much my life was like the ketchup and the mud. My life was messy with abuse, divorce, custody, control issues, anger, and unforgiveness. Yet I was bothered by the little bit of trouble another person had caused me. How silly of me to worry about this little bit of “ketchup” when my own life was covered in “mud” of my own choosing.
To help me focus more on cleaning up my own mess, my heavenly Father led me to Al-Anon. Al-Anon is not Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). Al-Anon is for the families of addicts, to help them heal and stabilize what can sometimes be a constantly changing or hostile environment. Through this group, my God helped me to let go of my need to babysit my ex husband. My Lord helped me focus on my own mess, and I was amazed at how much weight I was carrying that wasn’t mine to carry. I think I may have healed more from my childhood than I did from my broken marriage! I honestly wish I knew about Al-Anon sooner!!
Sometimes when you are in the middle of a situation it’s hard to see the reality of it. From an outside, or higher, vantage point the truth becomes a little clearer. I have not once regretted my decision to let God be the boss of my life. I have not once regretted doing things the Lord’s way and following Jesus. Reflecting on events like this one helps me remember how much I love my Father, and how much I need his help!
Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long. Psalm 25:5
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